I have some of my children who will just talk and talk and tell me everything. They have no problem at all expressing themselves or discussing their interpersonal challenges or relational difficulties with me. I have others for whom this type of discussion is painful. And still others who at times feel inadequately able to define or relay their challenges to mom and dad. And it is for these types of children I have encouraged the “Write Me A Letter” policy. (Truthfully, any kid can write me a letter, and policy sounds way more administrative than emotional…but hopefully you get the idea!)
Writing a letter is an incredible opportunity for a child (especially a teenager) to consider their words carefully and communicate their struggles. They can tell me every angle, feel free to share their feelings and take their time expressing themselves. Receiving the letter also gives me time to respond and think through the issues they want to discuss. And when we finally come together face to face, much anguish has dissipated and in love we can really talk it through. I have at times penned a note to apologize or reiterate something important to the children in a loving letter.
So feel free to use my “Write A Letter” idea with your loved ones. Encourage those children of yours who struggle with communication to try this different method. And at the end of the journey, you will have a beautiful written history of your relationship.