Santa brought crowns for each of my daughters this Christmas. It was a tribute to Daly Kay who has been working on writing a book about Queen Esther and just as a physical reminder of the truth that each of my daughters is a princess of the Most High King.
In Christian circles you run into all kinds. Some swear that Disney is Satanic. Some think it is dangerous to overload our daughters with the idea of becoming a princess someday, after all, what if their prince never comes? Some parents avoid the whole princess deal because they think that we should raise our daughters to see themselves as servants to others– so if we infuse them with this princess mentality they will become prideful.
I disagree with all of that and here is why.
Far too many young girls struggle with a real sense of worth. They struggle with how they see themselves physically. They feel like they have no voice. That they are invisible. That they have nothing of value to contribute. They struggle with an identity at all. They try to blend in and not be noticed because their individuality can be quite frightening. And a simple crown and a few verses along with heaping doses of encouragement from their parents can help assuage a lot of that.
Studying the book of Ruth and Esther has taught my girls
how the Lord views them…precious, beautiful (inside and out), favored, loved and adored. Glorious. And as a reminder, they tend to wear their crowns around town. Sometimes they get asked if they won a 
pageant. Every once in a while, they get mocked–interestingly enough usually only by grown men. Most other young girls gasp and ask where they got their crown and why they wear it…and my girls just smile and say that you can find them at Charming Charlie’s and that they wear it because they LIKE TO.
Moms, daughters, we are– every one of us— princesses of the Most High King. If we need to really wear the crown to remind us of whose we are, WHAT we are, if it helps us to remember to treat ourselves and our bodies with
dignity, if it helps us to stand up straighter and walk a little taller,
then wear the stinkin’ tiara. But if you want to raise a daughter who sees herself as worthy, dignified, and strong inside and out, remind her consistently that she is a daughter of the King.
“Learn to appreciate and give dignity to your body, not abusing it…” I Thessalonians 4:4-5
“She is clothed with strength and dignity” Proverbs 31:25
“All glorious is the princess within her chamber…” Psalm 45:13
“The king loved Esther more than all the other women, and she obtained grace and favor in his sight more than all of the others.” Esther 2:17
“And the king said to her, ‘What do you wish, Queen Esther, What is your request? It shall be given to you up to half the kingdom!'” Esther 5:3
cecilio farinas. says
god. .speed
Lyette Reback says
Thanx Coach! xoxo
Michelle Wiginton says
What a beautiful, beautiful perspective…a Godly perspective! I grew up “2 of 6” (yes, like the Borg on Star Trek)…I was a number, not a special, unique or beautiful daughter. I am now 47 and just NOW starting to feel that I am a princess of the Most High God…how much pain, heartache and loss I have endured because I did not feel valued, loved or special to anyone…not even God.
But, today is a new day…and I just might find me a tiara and wear it, too! Princesses of God’s Kingdom are princesses for life…even with gray hair! Thank you for reminding me whose I am and that God sees me as a princess, even when I do not.
Lyette Reback says
Go get a tiara Michelle…wear it loud and wear it proud! xoxoxo
Drew F says
I really appreciate this article.
Living in a culture where the “ideal” for a woman is so far from the ideal for a woman of faith, I imagine it’s often difficult for your girls to remain confident in their identities if those are merely defined by words they hear. I think we all go through things in life that challenge our identities and how we view ourselves, and if those experiences communicate to us ideas about our identities that are contrary to how the Lord views us, we often are left to sort through (often unsuccessfully) the disconnect between the Lord’s truth and our experience. While this is a reality for far too many people, I think you’ve touched on a very important idea that is both a Biblical and practical response – wearing crowns. Just as the acting out of one’s faith is rooted in participating in things of faith (prayer, fasting, the reading of and meditation on God’s Word, etc.) and is simply a working out of the truth we already understand about ourselves as individuals of faith, I think helping your girls act out their identities of being princesses (dignified, cherished, and loved) through wearing crowns is a beautiful way for you to help them to experience the truth of who they are. This is a really powerful thing that will help to reinforce what they hear from you about who they are and to combat the voices of those who seek to undermine this identity and to take advantage of their insecurities. Bless you and thanks for sharing.
Lyette Reback says
Thank you so much Drew for your encouragement. Growing up is tough. So if a simple crown and encouragement can help our girls grow to be the strong women with incredible purpose that God intended them to be, then it’s the best $14.99 I have ever spent. God bless you and yours!
Rachel says
This is such a great reminder. Even as adults, mommys, wives, etc. it’s hard to remember our worth some days, when all we think we’ve Accomplished is changing dirty diapers and breaking up bickering. Thank you for the constant encouragement.
Lyette Reback says
I feel ya Rachel…I really do. SOme days it’s hard to see if we made any progress or difference at all. But we did. I know we did.