I’ve been sick as a dog for 12 days now. A cold turned into a sinus infection that settled into my lungs. Bronchitis. And I’m pretty sure by now its pneumonia. I cough incessantly even though I’m taking nearly every medicine allowed for a woman seven weeks away from delivery.
Yes, I’m on antibiotics. Yes, I’m taking a nebulizer now every 2 hours. Yes, I’m drinking plenty but as any momma knows– the world doesn’t stop when you’re sick, and everybody still needs momma. Lord, this job is just tough.
And so I sit in my bed, coughing 20 seconds out of every minute, and think about Cherish and the fire department mom. Cherish– who in her rush makes a gut wrenching mistake, and fire department mom who in her desperation makes a gut wrenching decision. And I know I haven’t slept much in the last 12 days, but I can’t help but weep for the both of them and the harsh words being thrown their way by so many.
First of all, if you haven’t had one serious mistake in your parenting like what Cherish has experienced– just wait. Your time is coming. It’s not a matter of “if” it’s WHEN.
And if you’ve never had a season like Fire Department Mom where you are overwhelmed, outnumbered and flat out broke and hopeless…well then look up to the sky and shout THANK YOU to God. Because even under all the best of circumstances, a husband who loves me, a home we own, health, life and auto insurance…a couple of bucks in the bank…there are days…like today…where it is just beyond hard. And I have so many more securities and support systems in my life than fire department momma. I have help from a husband — her children’s father looked her square in the face and said he didn’t WANT the kids either!!! Where’s the outrage against HIM???? Why are so many vilifying the mother when the father who was co-creator of these children has obviously abandoned their mother AND THE CHILDREN? Isn’t he ULTIMATELY RESPONSIBLE?
[bctt tweet=”If you’ve never had a hopeless season like Fire Dept Mom, look up & shout THANK YOU to God. “]
I guess not. I guess we should just say that she shouldn’t have had sex before she was married. She should have known better. Cherish should have been able to think clearer. Because all of us mothers are so capable of clear thinking all the time. It could never happen to us, right?
Oh get off your high horse. Compassion people. She could have chosen abortion with both babies. She could have chosen matricide/suicide. I’d say her choice to give them a better life is in the end the toughest and most heroic.
Imagine you’re Cherish, the moment your three year old asks where the baby is…just frickin’ imagine that for one second. That pit in your stomach, that hot flash across your cheeks…that overwhelming fear…
Now imagine you’re Fire Department Mama. Imagine the hopelessness as you pull into that fire station. Imagine the sound of your baby in the car seat and the questions of your two year old…”Why are we here mama? Fire trucks! I want to see them!!” Imagine you have not a dime in your wallet, no money for rent, bare fridge and cabinets. Imagine the sniffle of the nine month old and the overwhelming sadness as you place your children into the arms of firemen and actually walk away– hearing your children crying and wailing and begging for mama. And imagine that you KNEW in your heart that a better family and a new home was a better way for your children to have a shot at life. If after imagining all that you are still able to hurl stones and accusations…then I doubt you actually have a heart beating inside your chest.
I’m not gonna cast stones. I’m going to pray. Somewhere there’s another Cherish and another fire department mama that needs my prayers. Stop hurling stones and join me on our knees. Those women need us.
[bctt tweet=”I’m not gonna cast stones. I’m going to pray. “]